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50 Quotes From Batman’s Nemesis the Joker

One of the most iconic super-villains in the DC universe and in popular culture in general, he is primarily known for being the dark knight’s archenemy. A criminal mastermind with a sadistic sense of humour, he is recognisable by his extravagant style and manic grin. As disturbing and bizarre as the following quotes might be, you will also find that they are thought-provoking.
Smile, because it confuses people. Smile, because it’s easier than explaining what is killing you inside.
The Joker – Heath Ledger

As you know, madness is like gravity…all it takes is a little push.
The Joker – Heath Ledger

Nobody panics when things go “according to plan”. Even if the plan is horrifying!
The Joker – Heath Ledger

joker-quotes-if-youre-good-at

If you’re good at something, never do it for free.
The Joker – Heath Ledger

Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos. I’m an agent of chaos…
The Joker – Heath Ledger

joker-quotes-what-doesnt-kill-you

What doesn’t kill you, simply makes you stranger!
The Joker – Heath Ledger

Do I really look like a guy with a plan? You know what I am? I’m a dog chasing cars. I wouldn’t know what to do with one if I caught it! You know, I just… *do* things.
The Joker – Heath Ledger

Tell your men they work for me now, this is my city!
The Joker – Heath Ledger

It’s not about the money, it’s about sending a message. Everything burns!
The Joker

Let’s put a smile on that face!
The Joker

Those mob fools want you gone. So they can get back to the way things were. But I know the truth, there’s no going back. You’ve changed things…forever.
The Joker

And I thought my jokes were bad.
The Joker

The only sensible way to live in this world is without rules. And tonight, you’re gonna break your one rule.
The Joker

Do you want to know why I use a knife? You see, guns are too quick. You can’t savor all of the little…emotions. In their last moments, people show you who they really are. So in a way…I knew your friends better than you ever did. Would you like to know which of them were cowards?
The Joker

Introduce a little anarchy, upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos, I’m an agent of chaos , and you know the thing about chaos? It’s fair.
The Joker

I don’t wanna kill you, what would I do without you? Go back to rippin’ off mob dealers… no, no, no… no you, you complete me.
The Joker

You can’t rely on anyone these days, you gotta do everything yourself, don’t we? That’s ok, I came prepared, it’s a funny world we live in. Speaking of which, you know how I got these scars?
The Joker

I took gotham’s white knight and I brought ‘im down to our level. Madness, as you know, is a lot like gravity, all it takes is a little push.
The Joker

If the police expect to play against the Joker, they’d better be prepared to be dealt from the bottom of the deck!
The Joker

Very neat! That ugly head of yours does have a brain!
The Joker

One by One, they’ll hear my call. Then this wicked town, will follow my fall.
The Joker

Madness is the emergency exit. You can just step outside, and close the door on all those dreadful things that happened. You can lock them away… forever.
The Joker

They could put me in a helicopter and fly me up into the air and line up the bodies head to toe on the ground in delightful geometric patterns like an endless June Taylor dance routine — and it would never be enough. No, I don’t keep count. But you do. And I love you for it.
The Joker

April sweet is coming in, let the feast of fools begin!
The Joker

Parting is such sweet sorrow, dearest. Still, you can’t say we didn’t show you a good time. Enjoy yourself out there… in the asylum. Just don’t forget — if it ever gets too tough… there’s always a place for you here.
The Joker

And he didn’t die all at once. It was hours before the screaming stopped. I almost didn’t get to sleep that night. That was the last time I’d used crushed glass…
The Joker

Live…and in person! The Caliph of Clowns, the Grand Mogul of Mountebanks, the One and Only JOKER! Prerecorded for this time zone.
The Joker

The real joke is your stubborn, bone deep conviction that somehow, somewhere, all of this makes sense! That’s what cracks me up each time!
The Joker

joker-quotes-havent-you-ever-heard

Haven’t you ever heard of the healing power of laughter?

I have given a name to my pain, and it is Batman.
The Joker

The pen, is truly mightier than the sword!
The Joker

Now comes the part where I relieve you, the little people, of the burden of your failed and useless lives. But, as my plastic surgeon always said: if you gotta go, go with a smile.
The Joker

Now you fellas have said some pretty mean things. Some of which *were* true under that fiend, Boss Grissom. He *was* a thief, and a terrorist. On the other hand he had a tremendous singing voice. He’s dead now, and he’s left me in charge. Now, I can be theatrical, and maybe even a little rough – but one thing I am not, is a *killer*. I am an artist. I *love* a good party. So, truce. Commence au festival!
The Joker

I now do what other people only dream. I make art until someone dies. See? I am the world’s first fully functioning homicidal artist.
The Joker

As though we were made for each other… Beauty and the Beast. Of course, if anyone else calls you beast, I’ll rip their lungs out.
The Joker

I’m of a mind to make some mookie.
The Joker

See, this is how crazy Batman’s made Gotham! If you want order in Gotham, Batman must take off his mask and turn himself in. Oh, and every day he doesn’t, people will die, starting tonight. I’m a man of my word.
The Joker

It’s a funny world we live in. Speaking of which, do you know how I got these scars?
The Joker

They need you right now, but when they don’t, they’ll cast you out like a leper!
The Joker

Do you want to know why I use a knife? Guns are too quick.
The Joker

It’s not about money, it’a about sending a message. Everything burns!
The Joker

We stopped checking for monsters under our bed, when we realized they were inside us.
The Joker

joker-quotes-the-only-sensible-way-1

The only sensible way to live is without rules.
The Joker

I’m different, f*ck your opinion.
The Joker

I like you, but I want to kill you.
The Joker

Does it depress you? To know just how alone you really are.
The Joker

You have nothing, nothing to threaten me with. Nothing to do with all your strength.
The Joker

Would ya like fries with that.
The Joker

Tell me something, my friend, have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?
The Joker

As my plastic surgeon always says; If you gotta go, go with a smile.
The Joker

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