Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese.

It’s weird that apples bruise like humans. I’m glad they don’t scream when you bite into them.

Be stupid, be dumb, be funny, if that’s who you are. Don’t try to be someone that society wants you to be; that’s stupid. So be yourself.

When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.

If you’re too open-minded; your brains will fall out.

How are we going to get out of here?”
“oh, escape is easy once you have the right plan.”
“do we have the right plan?”
“not yet.”
“do we have any plan?”
“not yet.

When a stupid man is doing something he is ashamed of, he always declares that it is his duty.

Until you’re ready to look foolish, you’ll never have the possibility of being great.

Oh, gilbert, don’t let’s ever grow too old and wise… No, not too old and silly for fairyland.

Being silly is still allowed, not excluded by adulthood. What’s excluded by adulthood is thoughtlessness, so be thoughtful and silly.

Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.

It’s not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.

Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid.

Your pants didn’t get smaller, mommy,” I assured her. “your butt got bigger.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I’m schizophrenic, and so am I.

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.

It takes considerable knowledge just to realize the extent of your own ignorance.

I’m childish and silly. Most people tease me because I’m a bit daft.

Have you ever heard a blindfolded octopus unwrap a cellophane-covered bathtub?.

Going to church doesn’t make you a christian any more than going to a garage makes you an automobile.

Do a loony-goony dance
‘cross the kitchen floor,
put something silly in the world
that ain’t been there before.

No man is exempt from saying silly things; the mischief is to say them deliberately.

Forgive me….i called you an idiot. I spoke too hastily. You are not. Had I given it more thought, I would have called you a scoundrel.

It has yet to be proven that intelligence has any survival value.

Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.

If a million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing.

Everyone should be able to do one card trick, tell two jokes, and recite three poems, in case they are ever trapped in an elevator.

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

I guess I just grew up thinking that when we become adults, we get to do what we love. For work, for fun, forever. I don’t know where I got that from. Seems silly now.

I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.

You know, people ask me. They say ‘dan, three years later do you really want to be drawing cat whiskers on your face?’ but they don’t understand. The cat whiskers, they come from within.

He actually caught himself saying things like “yippee,” as he pranced ridiculously round the house.

There is something beautiful about watching two people lovingly act silly together; behaving as though no one else existed.

If people did not sometimes do silly things, nothing intelligent would ever get done.

To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone.

Never dance in a puddle when there’s a hole in your shoe (it’s always best to take your shoes off first).

Sometimes being silly with a friend is the best therapy.

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.

I’d be foolish not to take some of these opportunities that are coming my way.

Trust is hard to come by. That’s why my circle is small and tight. I’m kind of funny about making new friends.

‘Have fun’ is my message. Be silly. You’re allowed to be silly. There’s nothing wrong with it.

Headline?” he asked.
“‘swing set needs home,'” I said.
“‘desperately lonely swing set needs loving home,'” he said.
“‘lonely, vaguely pedophilic swing set seeks the butts of children,'” I said.

Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life.

Whenever a man does a thoroughly stupid thing, it is always from the noblest motives.

Board the cows! we’ve come to enslave your marigolds.

The best way to convince a fool that he is wrong is to let him have his own way.

Um…is that thing tame?” frank said.
the horse whinnied angrily.
“i don’t think so,” percy guessed. “he just said, ‘i will trample you to death, silly chinese canadian baby man’.

Well, don’t expect us to be too impressed. We just saw finnick odair in his underwear.

I’ve been fighting to be who I am all my life. What’s the point of being who I am, if I can’t have the person who was worth all the fighting for?.

That’s why they call it the american dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it.

Always go to other people’s funerals, otherwise they won’t come to yours.

No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar.

Every time I do something silly, it comes off really funny because it’s natural.

When pain brings you down, don’t be silly, don’t close your eyes and cry, you just might be in the best position to see the sun shine.

What the hell is that?” I laughed.
“it’s my fox hat.”
“your fox hat?”
“yeah, pudge. My fox hat.”
“why are you wearing your fox hat?” I asked.
“because no one can catch the motherf*cking fox.

Make yourself look really stupid so you don’t feel bad doing something a little stupid.

A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.

They love their hair because they’re not smart enough to love something more interesting.

I don’t get embarrassed easily, and I do silly things all the time!

Just a few questions for you, mr. Dunne. Or kenny. Can I call you kenny? I feel we’ve become friends in these past few seconds. Can I call you kenny?.

I didn’t like the idea of being foolish, but I learned pretty soon that it was essential to fail and be foolish.

Good writing is remembering detail. Most people want to forget. Don’t forget things that were painful or embarrassing or silly. Turn them into a story that tells the truth.

Mix a little foolishness with your serious plans. It is lovely to be silly at the right moment.

Have you ever been at a point that you don’t know what to say? but yet you came up with this crazy idea to type this.

I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

It’s okay to be absurd, ridiculous, and downright irrational at times; silliness is sweet syrup that helps us swallow the bitter pills of life.

Just picked up a black pair of scissors thinking they were my glasses.
that definitely would’t have enhanced my eyesight.

A word to the wise ain’t necessary, it’s the stupid ones who need advice.

If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee.

People do not wish to appear foolish; to avoid the appearance of foolishness, they are willing to remain actually fools.

Damn, claire. Warn a guy before you do a face-plant on the floor next time. I could have looked all heroic and caught you or something -shane.

Who is more foolish? The fool or the fool that follows it?

The idea that you can somehow erase the Internet is silly.

You will do foolish things, but do them with enthusiasm.

Can I ask you something personal?”

six inches but I tell everyone eight.

Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.

With silly stuff, it’s seventy-five percent confidence. I always tell people that it’s because I’m nervous about getting that next laugh and I need to hear it. I always want to condense a joke.

How do you know what it’s like to be stupid if you’ve never been smart?

I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn’t a professional, the knife had butter on it.

Most of us would be upset if we were accused of being ‘silly.’ But the word ‘silly’ comes from the old English word ‘selig,’ and its literal definition is ‘to be blessed, happy, healthy and prosperous.’

Do people normally wear boxers under their pyjamas?.

When you’re young, you’re stupid. You do silly things.

If a book about failures doesn’t sell, is it a success?.

I thought i’d lie on the floor and writhe in pain for a while,” he grunted, “it relaxes me.”
“it does? oh – you’re being sarcastic. That’s a good sign probably.